Category Archives: sovereignty

Curses of Slavery 3 — Notes about Healing America

This is part 3 of a healing I did. For more information about this kind of healing, please take a look the earlier post, “Curses of Slavery Overview.” In that post I describe the beings and concepts that were part of the healing and might be unfamiliar to you. If you start there, you’ll find links to the earlier parts of the healing.

The most important point is that we can’t fight evil in the present. We need to go back and clean up the past so the evil we are in dissolves. As this healing shows, dealing with evil in the past rescues lost souls and removes the curses that cause our battles today. When we remove past curses with love, we heal without causing more harm.

29 August 2017

Well, it took longer than “tomorrow” for me to be ready to work on this again. It’s four days later and I’m still not sure I’m ready. We’ll try.

I put on my armor, call my helpers, remind myself again not to touch anything. I am supported by psychopomps, Light Tangler, two sets of khuyas from my personal mesa and my healing mesa, apus, Daddy Death, the Norns, and Grandfather Rock. Others are looking on and will help if we need it. I take time to work with my ñawis.

In soul reality I am in the center of my circle, standing at my crossroads. Hoocha Eater Khuya removes the hoocha from the inside of the circle. I close the circle to the outside.

Tom: Rider, can we take this circle and place it around Woman?
Rider: Carry it with us? Use it as protection? Maybe. We can try. We stand at the center, at the crossroads. Woman stands at her crossroads. We make them the same crossroads.
Tom: I can’t make it work.
Rider: Neither can I.
Tom: The best I can do is to put them side by side. That’s not what we need. I guess we’ll just have to go to her.

Rider takes us there.

Woman: Was that you just now?
Tom: Yeah, I was trying to get us both in my circle, but it didn’t work. So we came here without it.
Woman: Do we need the circle?
Tom: I don’t know. It seemed like a good idea for working in a safer place. We’ll have to try without it.

Physical reality interrupts. I speak with my favorite person there. And then back to soul reality and Woman.

Tom: Are we both ready to try to release the curses you made in America?
Woman: I don’t know.
Tom: Neither do I. No, we need to do some cleaning up first. Hoocha Eater, please remove enough hoocha so we can see the really bad stuff, like the curses.
Hoocha Eater Khuya: This would be better in the circle.
Tom: I don’t know how to bring the circle around us here.
Hoocha Eater Khuya: I don’t either. I’ll do what I can and try to keep cleaning everything up.
Tom: Thanks.
Hoocha Eater Khuya: See that one. [Hoocha Eater Khuya clearing out an area] That feels like the center of everything to me.
Tom: Yeah, I see it.
Woman: That’s the curse I made for the first beating. There’s the one when I got raped the first time. That’s the one where they took my first baby. There’s one where one of my babies died.
Tom: I can see them. It looks like there are echoes of those all over the place, from each heartbeat and each breath.
Woman: I DON’T want to get rid of them. Those bastards deserved every on of them and more.
Tom: And you didn’t deserve any of it.
Woman: We talked about that. Once I started cursing them, I don’t know who deserved what any more. Show me what happens if we take that curse apart.
Tom: Which one?
Woman: [Pointing] That one. The one when they raped me.
Tom: Okay. I was thinking about starting with the curse after the beating.
Woman: No. That’s an important one. The rape wasn’t that big a deal. That happened to everyone. They made those beatings special, just for me.
Tom: Mmmm. Yeah, okay.

The usual way to remove a curse is to find the pieces and have one of the helpers pull the power out from each piece. We find fertility, virility, and several diseases. Rapes for females in the bloodline. Incest through the generations. The compassionate Angel of the Southern States removes the energy in each piece, one by one.

As each piece goes, the sorrow caused by that part of the curse rises up. We see the suffering caused by incest in family after family. Sorrow caused by rapes. Sorrow caused by questions about manhood. And all the rest. One by one.

Woman: [in sadness, disbelief] I did all that!
Angel of the Southern States: You weren’t the only one. Not by a long shot. There’s others that did worse.
Woman: I don’t even want to know.

Angel of the Southern States: Last moment. Do I take it apart forever?
Woman: Yes. Take it apart.
Angel of the Southern States: Done.

It’s gone. Gone too are the echoes. It’s like a huge mass of energy fades away. Between the great curses there are many tiny specks of cursing. When the great curse is gone, the specks that reflected it disappear, too.

Tom: Are the little ones really gone?
Angel of the Southern States: Yes. They went away when the great curse stopped powering them.
Woman: Yeah, they’re all gone. It’s a burden lifted from me. Maybe it was all right to curse the ones who raped me. I’m not saying it was, but I think maybe. It was just not right, not right at all, to curse the ones who came after. I wasn’t their doing at all. And that’s where all the harm came from. I’m sorry and I don’t even know who to ask to forgive me.
Angel of the Southern States: It’s all right. It’s all right. Every one of those souls you cursed felt the curse lift. It helped a little bit. When all the rest of the curses from all the people who made them go away, they’ll be able to forgive. Most of them anyway. When they ask you to forgive them…
Woman: Maybe I will.
Angel of the Southern States: That’s how they feel, too. We’ve got a long way to go.

Tom: Thank you, Angel. Thank you, Woman. Let’s clean out the debris and hoocha.
Hoocha Eater Khuya: I’m on it.
Tom: I call on the River of Blessings to flow through here and all of the soul fields that held these curses. Go through the past and present and into the future. Please wash away the sorrow as best you can and let us find joy in making the world better and wisdom from what we’ve learned.
Woman: Amen.

I take a break in my home. And go back.

Tom: I see at least three more huge curses. Do we work on them now?
Woman: Let’s try one more, at least. Let’s do the one where my baby died.
Tom: You’re crying. I don’t see you crying any more. It looks like you want everyone else to be crying, too.
Woman: I’m all cried out now. But it was different then. I wanted them all to know what it was like to lose someone. To lose their baby.
Woman: Those White folks didn’t care about a Black baby. One of them said to me not to worry, there’s always more babies. She was trying to be kind, I knew that. But I cursed her anyway. She had lots of babies and they all died as babies except one boy.
Woman: I cursed them all. Every White person I saw. I cursed them that their baby would die. Some died. Many lived. But then there came this madness. They went to war to keep their slaves. So many, many babies, well they were young men then… So many of them died.
Woman: I surely don’t think I made that war all by myself. Not by myself. There were all of the slaves who lost their children working on the same thing. Escape from the master. Bringing the master down.
Tom: In my time it goes back and forth. Whites try to keep Blacks down. Blacks and other people with darker skin get some of their rights back, but they lose them again. It’s still not solved.
Woman: I’m sorry to hear that.
Tom: A lot of it is physical stuff like beatings, but both sides seem like they have ways to curse each other, too. I think it’s still echoes of the slave trade and what came before that, too. It’s way more than I can do by myself. But we can work on your curses about losing your baby, if you want.
Woman: Yeah, let’s do that.

We look at the curse, and it is just filled with the River of Sorrow. The curse pours the River of Sorrow on whoever was cursed, for all the person’s lives. It’s like a huge rainstorm with the rain falling so hard that you can’t see anything but the dark rain. If there is a blessing out there, there’s no way you could find it. All you can see is sorrow.

Lake Khuya: Remember the old saying, if you don’t want to get wet from the rain, jump in the river.
Tom: Yeah, that’s a good idea if you’re not too wounded or scared to jump.
Lake Khuya: I can send the River of Blessings around them.
Tom: We’ll do that, but I think we need to get rid of the curse first. All that sorrow falling into the River of Blessings can’t do it any good.
Lake Khuya: Okay. I’ll be ready when you’re done with the curse.

Tom: We need to find someone who can pull the energy from the River of Sorrow out of the curse. I don’t know who that is. Let’s think about that.

Woman: That will have to be me. I’m not crying any more because all my crying went into the river and all that river went into the curse. If I take the river out of the curse. I get back all my tears. I don’t know that I want them, but it’s the only thing that will work.
Woman: No, I can do it. I need to cry for my baby. I never did that. I need to do it to heal.

Woman reaches into her curse and pulls a plug. The River of Sorrow stops running into the curse and then it pours down on her. She cries for her baby. But it’s not like the curse when it happens to her because it does stop. We live in a world where we lose things all the time. Being able to cry for a loss and let it go is a blessing. We can see that when the River of Sorrow isn’t blinding us. She can see that now.

Throughout the reach of the curse others become less blind. There is one fewer River of Sorrow pouring down on them. As I ask, the River of Blessings flows through the places that were cursed. Some can see blessings and combine them with sorrows to find wisdom. Most can’t. There’s still a lot to do.

Tom: I’m exhausted. Can we continue tomorrow?
Woman: I need to grieve for my baby. When I’ve done that, we can go on.

Rider and I return. Thanks to all who helped and those who witnessed — including the people who read this report. You are witnesses, too. We feel your support as we work.

Armor off. Energy stored. Back to home.

Curses of Slavery 2 — Notes about Healing America

[WAHS] Curses of Slavery 2 — Notes about Healing America

This is part 2 of a healing I did. For more information about this kind of healing, please take a look the earlier post, “Curses of Slavery Overview.” In that post I describe the beings and concepts that were part of the healing and might be unfamiliar to you. If you start there, you’ll find links to the earlier parts of the healing.

The most important point is that we can’t fight evil in the present. We need to go back and clean up the past so the evil we are in dissolves. As this healing shows, dealing with evil in the past rescues lost souls and removes the curses that cause our battles today. When we remove past curses with love, we heal without causing more harm.

25 August 2017
It’s been two days since the last report. I admit that the thought of a billion curses was more than I could handle. But I woke up in the middle of the night with a plan.

I put on my armor. I gather my allies. I remind myself not to touch the curses. I call energy and information to help me with the healing.

Tom: Rider, please take me back.
Rider: Yes, glad to do it.

And we are there.

I work with Heart Khuya to make clear connections with the beings I will meet tonight. I work with Voice Khuya to find the skill to write clearly for you. I work with Will Khuya to focus myself on what I need to do. And with all three I ask for the ability to make a change in myself, you, and the beings who can remove the curses.

I reach out to the beings of place now, in the past, and in the future. I work with Hoocha Eater Khuya to remove enough hoocha in the moments I speak with others so that I can be seen and heard clearly. With Lake Khuya I create the safest place that we able to create. No place is truly safe with this many curses. In the water of the lake, they move slower.

Tom: Woman, I’m back.
Woman: So I see.
Tom: I have a thought. I have an offer.
Woman: Yes?
Tom: I think I can get you off of this post. I think I can get you out of this world — to a better place.
Woman: You think that, do you?
Tom: Yeah. But I’m not sure you’re going to like what you have to do.
Woman: And what’s that?
Tom: You need to release all your curses.
Woman: What the hell are you talking about? I just let those bastards get away with what they did? They beat me! They made me a slave! I’m not forgetting that!
Tom: And then you stay here and they stay here. And it never ends? It just gets worse ’cause all the children start piling up here, too. It’s getting crowded.
Woman: And you think giving up my curses is better?
Tom: I don’t know. I’m just asking you to take a look.
Woman: A look?

I drift…

Woman: Hey, you were gone there for a moment. Where did you go?
Tom: I went into thinking about what I would do with this report I’m writing up. I’m writing about what we say and do.
Woman: Yeah, and what do you plan to do?
Tom: I’m going to let other people know about what we did. Then I’m going to ask them to help take out more of the curses. I was thinking about the person who taught me curse removal and wondered what she would think about my sending this out to the world.
Woman: What do you think she’s going to say?
Tom: I don’t really know.
Woman: So you’re saying that if I say yes, you’re going to write this whole thing down so other people will help me?
Tom: I’m writing while we’re talking. I’m hoping my team and I can help you right now. But there are millions more people who have been making curses. I think you’re one of the best, but they all need help, too. I can’t do it all.
Woman smiles.
Woman: Yeah that’s the truth. But I’m willing to see if you can help with this one.
Woman: What if you can’t? Do you just toss this thing you’re writing?
Tom: No, I’ll pass it around and see if someone else has ideas.
Woman: You promise?
Tom: Yeah, I promise.

And when I made that promise this whole thing got a lot more real.

Woman: So let’s do this. What are you going to do?
Tom: There are a couple of ways to go. I need to stop talking for a bit and gather my team to see what they have to say. Is that okay?
Woman: Yeah, sure, why not?

Rider says, ask for her wish. Daddy Death says, Yeah, I can welcome anyone who wants to come. Psychopomps say, we can guide, but you need to gather the whole soul first.

Holder Khuya: How do we remove the curses?
Tom: Woman has the power and the skill to take the energy and purpose out of hers. We can unpin those.
Holder Khuya: What about the curses that were sent back at her?
Tom: If her curses aren’t there, there isn’t anything coming back. All we have to do is change the past.

The Norns say, we can do that, but it will cost you some real brownies and real coffee. Lake Khuya says she can flow the River of Blessings through everything and make everyone’s job easier.

Tom: Who can gather the soul pieces for Woman? That looks like the hard part.
Soul Gatherers [shells]: That’s not going to be all that hard. Woman stored them safe in the stake.
Tom: She did?
Soul Gatherers: Looks like that to us. Ask her.

Tom [to Woman]: I’m not quite ready yet, but I have a question. All those soul pieces that got broken off when you got whipped and everything else… where are they?
Woman: What do you think?
Tom: I think they’re in that stake. I think they’re safe in that stake right where you put them.
Woman: How did you know that?
Tom: Because if we couldn’t figure that out, it wouldn’t make any sense to be here. God, that was a good plan. This is going to be a lot harder for all those folks who lost their soul pieces. I hope they’ll start coming back when things aren’t as scary.
Tom: Give me a few minutes more to go over the plan.

So we think about what has to happen. It’s not going to be he same for every person. The psychopomps can figure out where Woman wants to go, but they can’t take her there until the soul pieces are returned. We know where the soul pieces are, but that’s not safe until the curses are gone. We’ve got Woman’s curses that we can probably get rid of, but that’s not clear. When we can get rid of her curses, we need to do it in the past to get rid of the curses that came back at her. I think we start with her first curse. But the first curses in the chain, the one that brought Woman and the slave owners together, are way, way back in the past before her life, maybe in her bloodline and maybe in the history of her soul [her previous reincarnations]. We need to get to those, too.

I take a break in my world, to refocus. This is going to take some time. And back we go to the place of healing.

Tom: Okay, I think we’re ready to start this. I think you’re good enough at this that I want your help. I’ll probably need it to get through the unclear parts. Is that all right? [Note that most curse removals are done without the client’s participation.]
Woman: Oh, yeah, I think you will need my help. It surely will be easier than doing it all yourself.
Tom: So here’s where we start. I’d like to find the first curse you made.
Woman: I grew up making curses. That’s my power.
Tom: Yeah, it thought that might be how it was. So, help me out. We’ve got a billion curses that come from your beatings. Does it make sense to start with the first curse that came from those, or do we need to get back to the first curse when you were taken to be a slave.
Woman: Better start with the slave one.

Holder Khuya and I search for the curse.
[There are lots of ways to search for curses. And lots of ways to make them go away. This isn’t a lesson in how to do that. It’s just a description of how this work looked from the outside. Take a class from someone who teaches this well to learn what it is really like to do the work. If you try it from what you read here, you will get hurt.]

Tom: [To Holder Khuya] Oh, it’s someplace else. [To Woman] Can you point us to it?
Woman: Oh, yeah. [Pointing in soul reality] It’s right here.
Tom: [to Holder Khuya] It’s huge. Can you handle it?
Holder Khuya: Maybe.
Tom: Let’s get help. [to Light Tangler] Can you handle this?
Light Tangler: Yeah, I’ve got it.
Woman: What the hell is that thing?
Tom: A friend.
Woman: That’s quite a friend. If you’ve got friends like that, you might have a chance.
Tom: We’ll see. So, we have this first curse held. There are a lot of pieces to it. A whole lot of pieces. Can you take it apart?
Woman: Yeah.
Tom: Can we do more than that? Can we go back farther and undo the curses that you brought into making it?
Woman: Oh, I don’t know about that. There’s a lot of powerful magic there and I don’t know if I can handle all of it. I can’t handle all of it. It goes back to the very beginning.
Tom: Too bad. I like it when we can clean up ancestors and soul lines. But this looks like too much. It’ll give you something to do in your next life.
Woman: Yeah, maybe so.
Tom: All right. Let’s pull this one apart. You got taken as a slave. I don’t think we can change that since we’re not going farther back. Can you pull the energy out and dissolve the curse before it was set?
Woman: Yeah, tell your friend to open up a space into it for me to get in. Yeah, that’s good. I just open this part up and let this soul I captured out and it sort of falls apart. You got someone to clean up the dust?
Tom: Yeah, we recycle. Fertilizer for the Tree of Life.
Woman: Yeah, yeah, that’s good. Good place for it.
Tom: It looks to me like a lot of the curses that came after sort of go away. You’re not getting cursed back. But it looks like your curses are going away, too.
Woman: Yeah, that makes sense. I built them on the first curse. Let’s recycle them, too.
Tom: Done. I think that pretty much gets us to America. How are you feeling?
Woman: Better. You know, I feel better. I think some of my soul just came back. God, this is hard. This is pretty much going to wear me out. I feel good, but this is really hard.
Tom: Do you want to take a break?
Woman: Yeah, I think I do.
Tom: Yeah, me, too. Can we go on tomorrow?
Woman: Well, I’m not sure what tomorrow means in this place, but, yeah, you can come back in your tomorrow. I will be here. Got nowhere else to go. At least not yet.
Tom: Okay, see you then.
Woman: All right. Blessings on you.
Tom: On you, too.

Rider and I come back. I take off the armor, thank my friends, khuyas, and allies, and make sure we are all in safe places – at least as best we can in this world.

Later that night I realized I needed to run the River of Blessings through our work. So I did.

Curses of Slavery 1 — Notes about Healing America

This is part 1 of a healing I did. For more information about this kind of healing, please take a look the earlier post, “Curses of Slavery Overview.” In that post I describe the beings and concepts that were part of the healing and might be unfamiliar to you.

The most important point is that we can’t fight evil in the present. We need to go back and clean up the past so the evil we are in dissolves. As this healing shows, dealing with evil in the past rescues lost souls and removes the curses that cause our battles today. When we remove past curses with love, we heal without causing more harm.

23 August 2017
I armor up in my protections. I call my allies to guard me, even from my own foolish rashness. I ask my khuyas to encircle me.
Light Tangler: And don’t touch the curses this time. [I’ve been known to touch curses to remove them. It almost always hurts and it’s always work to get the curse off me again. Other beings are much better at doing the actual removal.]
Tom: Okay.

Tom: Please, Rider, show me the curses on America.
Rider: Come ride.

We ride. I see hoocha, curses. They are thick where we ride. No man or woman could walk through the curses without being cut. The hoocha makes them impossible to see. The hoocha is so thick I can barely see the people. We ride.

Rider: Pick a curse. Pick this curse.
Tom: Where are we?
Rider: It doesn’t matter. People move all the time in America. It’s the same in most places. This is just one of a million curses that are all pretty much the same.

Tom: Holder Khuya, please bring that curse out of the hoocha so I can see it.

Holder Khuya reaches into the hoocha and delicately uses pincers like two fingers might hold the edge of a coin. He brings the curse to me.

I see beatings, whippings, unending work. Chains tying a human being to a post. Hot sun. Thirst. Hunger. Hope for a change. Prayers for a change. Hope dies. A loved one is sold. A loved one dies.

A Scream.

A Scream.

A Scream.

An unending, but silent Scream.

And each day is a curse. Each breath is a curse. Each heartbeat is a curse.

Until this person breaks and she dies and her curses, maybe one billion curses, are sealed by her death.

She was a slave in America. She cursed those who made her a slave. She cursed those who kept her a slave. She cursed her fellow slave because they could not help her. She cursed America. She cursed America because it was a land that lied about freedom and God and hope for salvation. She died and there was no salvation. The curse Holder Khuya held led back to her with an iron chain. Her soul could not escape the post they tied her to, even in death.

Tom: Thank you, Rider.
Rider: You’re welcome, Tom. Now let’s get to work.

I turn to my team.
Tom: Do we have the right to help her?
Team: She has no one else. We have met in this place. Huna practice would allow it. And we can ask her.
Tom: [to the woman] Do you wish our help? We can free you from this place and let you move on to a better place.
Woman: Do you really think you can? I think you are wrong. Look at me. There’s more than these chains. There’s more than this post.

So we look. Each of those curses that this woman sent out was answered. She came from a place that knew about curses. They were strong and effective curses, aimed at the ones who did the beating and their loved ones as far as the love went, and their children as long as children were born, and their parents and grandparents back to when America was born, maybe to the beginning of time. When a person is powerless in physical reality, power can still pour through the soul.

The ones she cursed came from a different place, but they felt every one of those curses and sent curses right back at her and everyone she held dear, enforced with whips and fists. Well, maybe a few missed from both sides. Those landed in America.

My team and I said, “Oh.”
The Woman smiled.

Woman: Now you got it. That’s the kind of curse this slavery is. You think on that for a while.
Tom: We will. And we’ll be back. We don’t have much choice. Those curses reached to us, too.

Rider brings me home. I wondered why everywhere I looked was full of hoocha and why it seemed like [in the present day] the Civil War never ended. Now I know.

Off with the armor. Thanks to my team, and my khuyas, and Rider. Hoocha Eater Khuya removes the hoocha from this story and from the space between the story and you, so you can see it clearly. Maybe you will understand why you need to help. Please let me know if that is your wish.

A Time to Not Forgive

Forgiving is not always the right path. In fact, there are times when the forgiving we have been taught to do is just plain wrong.

I will start with an example of forgiveness that works. Then we’ll look at some of the ways the forgiveness we have been taught actually makes things worse.

Effective forgiving lets an incident fade into the past. While some harm happened to one or more of the people involved, everyone can let it go as something they learned from. No one keeps thinking about all the things they could have or should have done.

How can that happen?

In this discussion I’m going to look at something that happened between two people. The ideas are almost the same for larger groups, but the language is a lot more complicated. I ask you to forgive me for simplifying.

The first part is to be totally clear about what happened. Both people need to understand their role in the situation. Both need to know how they were harmed. Both need to know how they harmed the other. And this point is vital: when harm is done, both sides are responsible to some degree for the harm.

I found the idea that both sides are always responsible in the practice of ho’oponopono. I explain why that is true in this post. Here’s the central idea of the ho’oponopono world, “Sometimes you and I work on cleaning up things at the same time. But even if one of us doesn’t, it’s still your responsibility and it’s still my responsibility to do it.” It’s worth going back and reading the rest of the post.

The second part of effective forgiveness is to be specific about the actions that caused the harm. They must match what the person who was harmed felt. There is an Incan practice called tupay (pronounced too-pie) that talks about using spirit allies to reach this agreement. It can be done by moving into any kind of blessing space where the goal is to learn instead of placing blame. In the process it really helps if both sides remember that both are always responsible for part of the problem.

The third part is to be sorry for the specific harmful actions. Without being sorry asking for forgiveness is meaningless.

Then there are the four steps in the ho’oponopono practice. (Check out the earlier post for the details.) I’m sorry for ________. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.

In a good relationship both people will do all four steps and both will forgive the other. We forgive only when we are asked to forgive. The incident will move from harm to learning. That’s how forgiveness can be done effectively.

But there are things that can go wrong even when using ho’oponopono.

One side may not be willing to admit they did anything wrong. That means there are still lessons for that person to learn. The other side should still do the ho’oponopono steps.

One side may choose not to forgive. Forgiveness is always a choice, never an obligation. Even when you choose not to forgive, you can still do your ho’oponopono steps. One time when it makes good sense to not forgive is when the harm that was done this time is a repeat of earlier harm. Forgiving once for significant harm, maybe twice, is probably enough.

When the ceremony is not complete, it’s important to consider if the best relationship choice is to cut the connections and end it. Later if the ho’oponopono can be done, cleaner connections can be reestablished.

Things are even worse outside this practice of mutual forgiveness. Let’s look at some of the times when so-called forgiveness is, as I said at the beginning, just plain wrong. I’ll use two people whose names are X and Y.

There’s forgiveness that’s a counterattack. X says to Y, “I forgive you for being a jerk.” This is a lovely bit of work. X writes off the action with “I forgive you” while accusing and convicting Y of “being a jerk.” I believe the reason X feels better is because X can tell the other person off in a way that Y can’t defend against. It’s a “better than thou” statement because X is holding itself blameless in the situation. However, X is not blameless, as discussed earlier.

There are variations to counterattack forgiveness. X might say to friends, “I guess I have to forgive Y, because that’s just the way Y is.” It’s an accusation that X’s friends agree with. If everyone agrees, then X must be right. Even X saying to itself that X forgives a person is mostly a way of justifying what X did and laying the blame for any problems on Y.

These counterattacks are also ways for X to avoid looking at what X may have done. By putting the need for forgiveness on Y, X is defending its own actions as not needing forgiveness. X, as discussed earlier, is wrong.

Forgiveness to keep a relationship going is wrong. When X forgives Y for coming home drunk for the one-billionth time, needing to forgive is just an excuse for codependency. In fact X should also be asking Y to forgive X for putting up with Y’s behavior. Putting up with Y’s bad behavior is not in Y’s best interest.

Forgiveness to be magnanimous is wrong. It goes like this, “Oh, I forgive everybody. You can’t imagine what I’ve gone through. Let me tell you about what Y did…” There is no learning, no letting go. It’s just a pile of hoocha.

There are times when forgiveness is requested that are also wrong.

One time is when X asks forgiveness for something X knows is harmful, but X isn’t really sorry. It’s just a way for X to see if Y will let X get away with this harm — usually for the billionth time. This is not a time for Y to forgive.

When Y is in danger, it’s even worse. No one has the right to harm you. I’ve talked other times about unconditional love. The conclusion is the same here: your safety comes first. Anything else is suicidal codependence. Real forgiving is not something you do when you are in danger. Saying you forgive and getting to a safe place is a much better plan.

A second kind of case is when X just doesn’t get the problem, but asks for forgiveness anyway because that’s the only way to keep the relationship going. Either of these problems may exist:

X is totally clueless. There needs to be a meeting to clue X in so that the request for forgiveness is meaningful and X can learn.

Y is gaming X by saying there is a problem when there isn’t. Again there needs to be a meeting, After the meeting, Y needs to ask X’s forgiveness for gaming.

I’m sure there are other cases where forgiveness is wrong. Please write back with your thoughts and I’ll include them in the comments. I will finish the discussion with some overall thoughts about forgiving.

Asking for forgiveness does not always have to be said out loud or to the person you hope will forgive you. You are working with the Divine. What you need is your own forgiveness and it can be granted in many ways.

If you keep remembering an incident easily, naggingly, with lots of “I shoulda done this,” you’re not through with the forgiveness process. Things that are forgiven don’t keep bothering you.

Forgiveness done the wrong way ties you tighter to the person. It adds to the cording.

Resolving anger by forgiving with a better-than-thou attitude just adds more negative intensity.

A clueless person can be forgiven for not being educable. This lets you know you need to deal with this person in a different way, which is really forgiving yourself.

Forgive only when you are asked to forgive.

Ask for forgiveness every time you do something that causes harm.

Almost always look first at what you need to be forgiven for. Then use the most appropriate way to ask for forgiveness.

The Devas of Science and Magic 1– Notes about Healing the Earth

We hear a lot about the harm that humans are causing the earth. Sometimes people talk about harming the soul of the earth, whom they call Gaia, Pachamama, and many other names. I believe the harm is real.

I also believe that humans need to do more than stopping our harmful activities. Because we can, we are here to heal past hurts, which may or may not have been caused by humans. Beyond that, we are here to make our physical reality and the souls connected with it more wonder-filled than they already are.

But, let’s be realistic about what we can do. Right now there is so much hoocha and negative life force that making something new probably needs to wait until we clean up the problems of the past.

And that’s what the upcoming series of “Notes about Healing” will look at. Continue reading and add your comment

Souls, Hate, Free Speech, and the Charlottesville Killing

It’s better to shine a light on a riot of flowers than to cast a Shadow on others in a riot of humans.

Hatred, hoocha, and negative life force are bubbling to the surface of American life. Let’s take a look at what is happening from a soul perspective.

We’re seeing the Shadow of America — all the dark impulses that are usually hidden beneath the surface of our culture. It is scary when it bubbles up to a level that we are aware of.

In a person, the Shadow usually lurks below the level of consciousness in the Wish or Will regions of the soul. In a group (America in this case) the Shadow lurks in parts of the population that are seldom seen by the majority of Americans. When the Shadow makes itself known, and we’re not part of the Shadow, we seldom know what to do with it.

In the Charlottesville situation, there are two sides. Let’s call them Blue and Red. Continue reading and add your comment